


it's nice to have a friend

by bluesxrgent



Category: SKAM (France)
Genre: 75 Dates In The Skam Universe, Childhood Friends, First Kiss, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, oblivious idiots, roller skating date, we love them for it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-06
Updated: 2019-09-06
Packaged: 2020-10-11 06:26:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20541587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluesxrgent/pseuds/bluesxrgent
Summary: 5 times eliott and lucas definitely were not on a date, and one time they were (ft. rollerskating)for 75 dates in the skam universe ✨





	it's nice to have a friend

**Author's Note:**

> i listened to it's nice to have a friend by taylor swift and had the urge for soft childhood friends to lovers, so voila
> 
> this is much longer than anticipated but i really liked writing it so i hope you like reading it <3

1.

Platonically roller skating with your bro was cool, right? No homo or anything? Not that Lucas didn’t want there to be homo, he just didn’t think Eliott did. They weren’t on a date, obviously, but all of their other friends had bailed on plans last minute, so they’d adjusted the plans and it ended up being just the two of them. Roller skating like bros.

The lights cast a violet haze over them as they tied their skates up, illuminating Eliott’s smile like it was a work of art by itself. The little wheels on the bottom of Eliott’s shoes were a luminescent blue, the color of the sky, or the color of his eyes, depending on the way you looked at them. Lucas’ were yellow, which was whatever, yellow wasn’t his favorite color but it wasn’t his least favorite either. He’d argued with Eliott when they were picking them up, because the yellow used to be the color Eliott always wore when they’d skated there years ago, and blue was Lucas’ color, but unfortunately their feet were different sizes now and he was thus relegated to yellow. 

The local roller rink only ever played the cheesiest music, and Lucas wasn’t disappointed that night, he was pretty sure “Dancing Queen” by Abba was playing at the moment. Cheesy, of course, but much better than what it could have been. Last time he was there they’d played Justin Bieber on loop for an hour. His ears were still bleeding when he thought about it long enough. 

Eliott finished tying his skates before Lucas did, holding out a hand to help him up once he did finish. If Eliott felt the electricity when their hands touched, he didn’t show it. Still clasping Eliott’s hand, he was led across the carpeted area over to the actual roller rink where the swirling lights shone brighter than in the lobby area, casting unique designs on everyone and everything. 

Just as they stepped onto the rink, the song changed, a somewhat melancholy tune he hadn’t heard before, transporting him into the feeling that he was in a movie, or somewhere he could pretend this actually was a date and that Eliott’s hand on his meant something more than it did. 

They’d come to this same roller rink so many times as kids, their preferred place to be Eliott and Lucas, best friend extraordinaires. It was the place that Lucas, at age thirteen, had first realized what he felt for his best friend went a little beyond friendship. Maybe it was the way that the lights reflected off his unruly hair, the way that they were doing so now, or maybe it was Eliott singing the horrible cheesy music to him at the top of his lungs like they were the only two people in the world, but Lucas had fallen hard then and had never come back from it. He’d only gotten better at hiding it. 

When Eliott got a girlfriend Lucas wondered if he’d bring her here, it’s where Lucas would have wanted to go on a real date, but he never did. Lucas had asked him about it once and Eliott had just shrugged and said Lucille didn’t like roller skating, she preferred ice skating. It made sense, but Lucas allowed himself to believe that Eliott never brought any dates here because it was a special place to the two of them. Of course it wasn’t true, but he was nothing if not effective at convincing himself their connection went deeper than friendship. 

Eliott wore his heart on his sleeve, which was a beautiful and brilliant habit, but it did hurt when that heart never looked at him, not once. Lucas’ heart couldn’t keep its eyes off Eliott, he was just better at hiding these things. It was easier when he was only just realizing his feelings for Eliott, because no one knew how he felt about boys at that point, so he could easily pretend his moony expressions and mild avoidances were attributed to some nonexistent girl on his mind. Nowadays, things were getting harder, but at least Lucas had years of practice. 

The dreamy atmosphere had Lucas closing his eyes, letting himself skate without looking, imagining that he was soaring above the clouds, and that the lights surrounding him came from the sun setting and casting colors on the clouds he floated through. 

“I’ve missed this,” Eliott said, spinning Lucas around. Lucas opened his eyes, catching his balance on the end of the spin before he stumbled into Eliott. 

“Missed what?” he asked, words as feather light as the eyelashes Eliott looked at him through. 

“Me and you, the roller rink,” Eliott said, “You’re always different when we’re here, freer.”

Lucas supposed it was true, something about the atmosphere just made Lucas feel at home, reminded him of some of their best memories. He loved their other friends, he did, but some part of him had always hoped it would just be the two of them forever. He didn’t know Eliott felt the same way. 

“It’s because we’re floating on the clouds,” he said, gliding past Eliott, turning around to watch as he followed. “When else do we get to do that?”

Eliott shrugged as he skated closer. “Every time I’m with you I feel like I’m floating in the best way possible.”

Lucas became intimately aware of how close Eliott was to him, their hands no longer tied together, but brushing with a purpose as Lucas skated backward and Eliott skated forward, side by side, strides completely in sync. 

It was easy to pretend this was more than it was, that Eliott might take his hand with a different purpose and pull him close, that they might spin together under the cheesy and cliche disco ball hanging over their heads, spinning until they were dizzy and drunk in love. 

Looking up at Eliott, seeing the corners of his eyes creased as he looked down at Lucas, smile on his face that Lucas fell in love with every night before he went to bed, Lucas was struck with a realization. He’d always thought Eliott was the sun, and he was the moon, but he knew it wasn’t true. Eliott was the entire universe, and he was just a star passing by, so grateful to be a part of it. 

If he couldn’t have Eliott in every way, it was nice to have him at all. 

2.

The plan hadn’t been to go back to the roller rink, but there they were, skates in hand, watching the neon glow of their childhood together, all those memories, ready to make more. This time they hadn’t even bothered to ask their other friends, and Lucas wondered why. He knew from his end, but he didn’t know why Eliott didn’t protest. They’d hardly been alone together since their last day at the roller rink, and Lucas wondered if he’d done something wrong. 

The rink was practically empty, as it always was these days, but Lucas preferred it that way. When they’d come as children the rink was always overflowing with people, old and young, and their parents would get mad at them for disappearing, only to be found in the middle of the rink, spinning each other until they got so dizzy they felt like they were going to throw up.

Lucas wondered if the rink might close someday soon, it was obvious their business wasn’t what it used to be, and he hoped to any god that would listen that wasn’t the case. This was the one place where he could let himself be free and in love and Eliott didn’t notice because he was free as well. Free to do what, Lucas never knew, but he could always tell the differences the roller rink wrought in both of them. 

Their skates were the same as last time, Lucas with yellow and Eliott with blue. They had never even considered buying their own skates, even though they probably could have used them. Although, from the small number of people at the rink, it didn’t seem likely that many people other than them were using those particular skates.

Skating always required a lot more energy that Lucas thought it would, despite having done this activity more times than he could count, so he and Eliott took a break after a while, right as the trusty sounds of Justin Bieber filled the speakers. 

They sat at a table, Lucas watching Eliott, who was focusing intently. He was drawing something on Lucas’ hand, a thing he’d done since they were kids and Lucas had only grown to love more and more as they both got older. 

When Eliott was like this, working on a certain task with laser focus, Lucas was free to watch him all he wanted. It was perhaps one of his favorite things to do, to take in all the minute details that made Eliott Eliott. 

Like this: the way one of his eyes squinted more than the other while he drew, trying to get his design exactly how he’d pictured it in his head. Or this: the way the roller rink lights only illuminated one half of his face and his hair from the way he was sitting, changing color every second or so from red to purple to pink to orange to yellow to green to blue and back again. The way one of Eliott’s hands held Lucas’ in place on the table so he could draw from all angles, and the way that even that simple touch could make all of Lucas’ nerves stand on end and his heart race in his chest. 

Nearly everything Eliott did made Lucas’ heart race, but when they touched it was like someone had set off an array of fireworks in his chest and wouldn’t stop until they parted. Lucas didn’t ever want the fireworks to stop. 

“Done!” Eliott said, clearly pleased with himself as he put the cap back on his pen and released Lucas’ hand. Lucas lifted his hand to see the design and grinned against his will. 

Eliott was the absolute only person in the world that could call him Choupi or refer to him as a hedgehog and live to tell the tale. Arthur had called him Choupi as a joke, a total of one time, and had nearly lost both of his kneecaps.

These animals, the way that they served as an embodiment of who they were, were Lucas and Eliott’s thing. Eliott’s first, but Lucas had been his best friend as long as he could remember, and they shared everything, especially the things that meant the most to them. Eliott had known Lucas wouldn’t laugh when he talked about raccoons and how he felt a connection to them, and Lucas had known that when Eliott drew him as a hedgehog for the first time it wasn’t an insult, but a show of love. 

The drawing on Lucas’ hand was of a hedgehog and a raccoon roller skating together, small hearts surrounding them as they smiled, the hedgehog looking in front of him and the raccoon looking at the hedgehog. 

“I love it Eliott,” Lucas said, because he did. _ I love you _, he meant, because he did. 

Eliott’s answering smile, so big that it looked like it might actually hurt, made Lucas’ heart melt into a giant puddle inside his chest and made him forget how to breathe momentarily. What else was new. 

They had to wait for the ink to dry on his hand before they went back to the rink, because Eliott had a tendency to pull Lucas by the hand or to catch him when he slipped, and Eliott was adamant about not letting the ink smudge. Lucas was just as adamant about it, but he would never admit it aloud. 

“Why hearts?” He found himself asking as they waited, cursing his brain for allowing him to speak at all. Eliott went red and Lucas wanted to slam his head into the table. _ Way to be obvious, Lucas. _

Eliott gestured to the rink, and Lucas nearly slammed his head on the table in embarrassment. Of course. The decorations were all heart shaped because Valentine’s Day was coming up. He was an idiot, an absolute idiot. “Forgot about the best holiday of the year?” Eliott asked, voice lilting and teasing. 

“Of course you would think it’s the best holiday of the year,” Lucas teased right back, because he knew that Eliott loved cheesy holidays like that. 

“Maybe if you had a hot guy by your side you’d like it more,” Eliott laughed, wiggling his eyebrows up and down. Lucas laughed instinctively, despite the pain stabbing into his chest. 

Lucas raised his own eyebrows. “Right back at you.”

Did it hurt that, when Eliott had come out as pan a year after Lucas had come out as gay, he still never looked at Lucas as more than a friend? Definitely not. 

“Who says I don’t have one?” Eliott said, grinning and nudging his side. 

Lucas tried not to let his broken heart tear his insides too deeply. “I hope they’re worth it,” he said, because he didn’t know what else to say. 

“They are,” Eliott said, touching his hand lightly before gripping it and pulling him away from the table and back onto the rink. 

A ballad was playing, just like at middle school dances, but Eliott was undisturbed, singing the lyrics into Lucas’ ear while he did a dramatic display that he would argue should have put him in a world famous musical. Lucas fell in love again. 

3.

Somehow the whole gang had caught wind of their roller skating plans, so roller skating for two had turned into roller skating for five. It was probably a good thing, the last time they’d been to the rink alone had been a little too much for Lucas to handle. All the Valentine’s decorations were gone, replaced with their usual decor, magical in its own way. 

Eliott hadn’t ever told him who he’d been talking about that day, and they’d ended up spending Valentine’s together watching a cheesy rom com Eliott had begged Lucas to come over and watch. He never asked why Eliott wasn’t out with someone like he’d done for the past five years of their lives, because sometimes he didn’t need all the answers. Sometimes he just needed his best friend to need him, even if it was on a holiday meant for lovers. 

Eliott’s skates still had blue wheels, Lucas’ still had yellow, but their colors were joined by Yann’s pink, Arthur’s green, and Basile’s orange. Lucas had asked Eliott to come with him to the roller rink that day because it had been classic rock night, which meant the music would be _ good _ for a change, and they could enjoy it without making fun of it. 

The first notes of Queen’s “Don’t Stop Me Now” played as Lucas stepped onto the rink, four of his best friends behind him. If any of them were suspicious about Lucas’ feelings towards Eliott, they didn’t say anything to him or Eliott, so at least there were small miracles in the world. 

The spirit of Freddie Mercury propelled Lucas forward, and maybe he was showing off a little bit, but all the trips he’d taken here over the years had paid off in some ways. Basile was fumbling along, and Arthur kept nearly falling only because he was laughing as Basile so hard. Yann knew what he was doing, but someone had to keep an eye on Arthur and Basile, so Eliott and Lucas did what they always did, blocking out everyone and everything else. 

Lucas lapped Yann, Arthur, and Basile nearly three times before Eliott, laughing, told him to slow down, otherwise their friends would feel too inadequate. Eliott took one of his hands, one of Basile’s, pulling the two of them as Lucas scrambled to grab onto Yann who grabbed onto Arthur so they wouldn’t get left behind. 

Classic rock night tended to bring out an older crowd than usual, so they got a great number of dirty glares from the other attendees as their five person line stumbled their way around the rink. Basile nearly took out a husband and wife, trying to sway and skate on their own, and Arthur ran into the barrier on the side of the rink more times than they could count. Everyone was laughing too hard to care about any of it, Lucas and Eliott in the middle changing things up every once and a while to throw the others off balance.

Perhaps it had been a long while, but to Lucas it felt like no time at all, so when Basile, Yann, and Arthur left to return their skates, out of breath and possibly nauseous, Lucas and Eliott stayed for one more song, letting themselves pretend it had been the two of them alone the entire time. 

“This wasn’t what I expected,” Eliott said as they skated, looking over at their other friends. 

“What?” Lucas asked, looking up at Eliott as he always was. 

Eliott looked down at him, meeting his gaze. Piercing, bright, electric, _ everything _. “I thought it would just be the two of us.” They kept skating, and Lucas was glad the lights were alternating between purple and pink, hiding the blush on his cheeks. After a moment, Eliott continued, “Didn’t you?”

“I did,” Lucas said without thinking it through, panicking a second only to be rewarded by a brief but luminescent grin on Eliott’s end. 

“Next time,” Eliott said, like he was certain there would be a next time. There probably would, but it was hard for Lucas to have that kind of certainty about anything, always expecting the worst to disrupt his life. The only thing he’d ever been certain of was loving Eliott, and some days it was hard to tell whether that was the best or worst thing in his life.

The song ended too soon, and Eliott’s smile went with it. Was it selfish to wish to pause time, just to witness Eliott’s joy for one more second?

But he couldn’t pause time, so the moment passed and Eliott and Lucas vacated the roller rink to go find their friends. Their friends, who didn’t understand the significance of a roller rink, or a hedgehog, and who didn’t make Lucas’ heart beat in irregular patterns every time they were together. 

It wasn’t the worst thing in the world, to have people who didn’t _ understand _ , but sometimes Lucas wished that they would, that they would see that he was in love and there was nothing any of them could so about it. Yet it was always a relief and a curse when they would ask him who he had his eyes on, who he wanted to hook up with. On the one hand, they didn’t know, and on the other _ they didn’t know _.

So Lucas reveled in his own melancholy, determined to stay that way until the day he either died or stopped loving Eliott, whichever came first. Given that these feelings had prevailed for almost four years at this point, he was pretty sure the former was more likely.

“Eluuuuuu!” Basile yelled as they met up, and Lucas rolled his eyes. He didn’t know when his friends had decided to combine their names and refer to them as such, but somehow it had stuck and didn’t seem like it would go away any time soon. Secretly, Lucas loved it. Not so secretly, Eliott loved it.

“Basyarthur,” Eliott greeted with a wide grin, combining the other three’s names in a similar fashion every time, but always a different combination. 

Arthur nodded appreciatively. “I think that one’s my favorite so far.”

“Why thank you,” Eliott said with a mock bow, meeting Lucas’ eyes as he straightened up. Like a shot from a movie the light began to frame his face, circling him in a glow of neon light, spectral divinity dancing across each and every one of his features. Lucas knew he was staring, but he couldn’t stop himself as he did so.

“Lucas?” A nudge on his shoulder snapped him out of his reverie. Eliott was still looking at him, but the intensity had vacated his eyes and the lights had gone back to normal. Yann nudged him again. “Shall we?” he asked, gesturing to the entrance. 

Lucas nodded noncommittally, following everyone a few steps behind them. Eliott hung back as well, brushing a finger across the back of Lucas’ hand, a grounding sort of gesture they’d used for years when the other person seemed out of sorts. The touch was sweet and gentle and said _ I’m here _. The touch also set Lucas’ heart aflame, but that was something he was working on.

Someday, maybe, that touch would say you’re mine and I’m yours and this was the way it was always meant to be. Someday, maybe, that touch would set Eliott’s heart aflame as well. 

But for now, Lucas looked up at Eliott, and Eliott looked down at him, and they smiled, always finding a way to be alone together in a room, no matter how big or small the crowd around them.

4\. 

Lucas wasn’t sure which one of them suggested it, but going to the roller rink high off their asses was an entirely new experience. School was about to start soon and Eliott was anxious about

going to university, so they’d decided they needed a way to relieve stress. The roller rink was the obvious solution, the weed was just an extra incentive. 

He couldn’t stop laughing, and he was sure the rink attendees knew or at least suspected that they were high, but thankfully the rink was empty enough that no one said anything.

They were in the same skates with their yellow and blue wheels once again, and Lucas couldn’t stop spinning the wheels with his hands long enough to put the skates on his feet. Was it just him or were the wheels spinning faster than usual? He laughed, catching sight of Eliott through the wheels. 

“Lu… cas…” Eliott stretched the two syllables of his name out long and slow, giggling. Lucas knew about Eliott’s bipolar disorder, knew that he shouldn’t smoke often, but it had been a very long time since either of them had gotten high, and Lucas trusted that if Eliott said it was fine, it was fine. Eliott was always so giggly when he was high, not that he wasn’t soft and smiley in general, but the effect of the weed took it to a whole new level.

Lucas hummed up at Eliott in response, a moment or so too late, as he’d been too lost in thought to make his mind or his body function at all. Eliott laughed again at his delayed response, tapping the tip of his nose. “You’re so cute,” he said.

Any other time, Lucas might have exploded right on the spot, but at that moment he was too relaxed to explode. All he could do was make a noise of contentment and whisper back, “The absolute cuuuuutessstttt.”

He was cute, there was no denying it. 

Somehow the skates had gotten on his feet, though he didn’t quite remember putting them on, but Eliott held out a hand, Lucas took it, and they both immediately fell over on top of each other, earning a glare from the mother and child at the table beside them, but they were too busy laughing to care. 

“Do you think we’re… _ too _ high?” Eliott whispered conspiratorially, moving lazily to unscramble their limbs.

Lucas screwed up his face as he stayed lying on the ground. “Pssh. As if.”

“Now get up, I brought you here to skate not lay on your ass,” Eliott giggled, attempting to pull Lucas up, who refused to be pulled up, leaning all his dead weight into the floor. The skates made Eliott slip again and soon they were both still lying on the floor, laughing harder than they had in a long time. 

They did get up, eventually, mostly because the mom who had looked at them disdainfully had complained and one of the roller rink employees had repeated her spiel to them with a sigh that said, _ I am not getting paid enough for this _. Maybe they’d been looking at each other and trying not to laugh the whole time, maybe Eliott’s hand had found Lucas’ as the employee gestured towards the rink and told them to enjoy their day. Maybe, maybe, maybe.

Why had they never gone to the rink high before? This was a whole new experience. Lucas usually felt like he was soaring while skating, but at the moment he wasn’t even sure if his feet were on the ground.

Whoever was in charge of the playlist that day did an excellent job. It was calm, maybe too calm, but it was freeing. The music was embedded in the gusts of air that ruffled Lucas’ hair as he skated by Eliott in a blur, a form of art subtly akin to breathing. 

There was a point right at the peak of a high when all the giggles subsided and all the dizziness went away where there was a certain clarity, sort of like a third eye opening, and it was like the stars aligned in the way they were always meant to align. There was a sharpness in Lucas’ vision that hadn’t been there before and there was a certain sense of rightness, like everything he had ever wanted could come true if he just pushed himself to reach for the things he wanted. What he wanted most in the world was Eliott. He already had Eliott, of course, but he wanted Eliott forever and always, in all the ways that mattered. 

Something in Eliott’s eyes said that he wanted that too. Normally Lucas wouldn’t dare, so he made himself a deal. If the lights went yellow in the next ten seconds, and circled Eliott in a golden haze of light like the sun he was, Lucas would kiss him. If the lights went blue, surrounding them in an ocean of LucasandEliott and EliottandLucas, he would wait. 

One

Two

Three

Four

Five 

Six

Seven

Eight

Nine—

Lucas’ heart raced, then dropped. They were blue. 

Eliott still looked beautiful, even in blue, but blue was the color of Lucas’ unrequited love, of the feelings that would never be returned, of the ocean that was LucasandEliott and EliottandLucas and then just Lucas. Just because he was accustomed to being alone, didn’t mean he didn’t still yearn inside at the thought of that changing.

Lucas was so lost in thought that he didn’t anticipate Eliott’s arms weaving their way around his shoulders, tucking Lucas into his chest and staying still in the middle of the rink. Or maybe they were spinning, it was sort of hard for him to tell. 

“Thank you,” Eliott said. 

Lucas tipped his head back and wrapped his arms around Eliott’s middle. “What for?”

“For being you. For this.” Eliott didn’t loosen his grip at all, but he lifted his head, casting his eyes to the ceiling and beyond. 

“You never have to thank me for that,” Lucas said, “You never have to thank me at all.”

“I know. That’s why I want to.” Eliott’s grin was all encompassing, so beautiful and grand that when he lowered his head and pressed a kiss to Lucas’ forehead it took a moment to register, Lucas’ brain still focused on the blinding way his soul was lit by an infinite glow. 

Eliott didn’t kiss him again, and they stayed like that for so long, the two of them tangled in a hug, that Lucas began to think it might all be a dream. If so, he didn’t want to wake up anytime soon.

5.

None of their other friends had wanted to go to the roller rink, and Lucas was secretly glad. It wasn’t that he didn’t like their other friends, but he liked Eliott best. Everyone knew it, and everyone knew Eliott liked Lucas best.

Lucas’ thirteenth birthday had passed without fanfare, so when Eliott had suggested they go to the rink to celebrate, Lucas had been overwhelmed with appreciation for his best friend. He always knew the best ways to make Lucas feel special. Lucas wondered if he’d suggested the roller rink because he knew their other friends wouldn’t want to come. 

They grabbed their skates at the front desk, tying them up giddily. The little wheels on Eliott’s skates were a golden yellow, a color that suited Eliott greatly in Lucas’ opinion. He was full of so much light, it only seemed fitting he’d skate on wheels that were somewhat of an embodiment of the sun. The wheels on Lucas’ skates were blue, an ocean blue that Eliott always said matched his eyes. He didn’t know if that was true or not, but it always made Lucas feel good, like Eliott had been paying as much attention to these things as he had.

Lucas was also glad it was just the two of them, because he had to tell Eliott something he wasn’t ready to tell everyone else yet. He just had to work up the courage. The ever changing rainbow of lights seemed to mock him as they skated, telling him to_ just say something already _. He wanted to, but every time he opened his mouth the words stayed stuck in his throat.

_ Eliott, I’m gay. _

He imagined Eliott smiling that trademark smile of his, taking his hands and spinning him around. Saying, _ That’s so great Lulu! _ because he was the only one allowed to call him Lulu and Lucas secretly loved it when he did. 

He’d run through a script in his head of any possible reactions or questions Eliott might have, though none of those scenarios had ever included a poor reaction. He knew Eliott too well, he knew that whatever he might say or do, it would be tinged with excitement and acceptance, no matter what. 

If Eliott had asked him how he knew, he might have blushed and muttered something about Troye Sivan, even if Eliott probably didn’t know who that was. Not only did Troye Sivan have great advice and insight, he was also very, very attractive, a fact Lucas had realized with the feeling of a lightbulb going off in his head. 

Eliott might joke about Lucas having a crush on him, to make him feel less awkward and to make it seem normal as anything else, and Lucas would laugh, saying _ ew, never! _just to make Eliott laugh in fake offence. Because obviously, Lucas would never have a crush on Eliott. Eliott was Eliott, that was all. 

Sure, Eliott was really beautiful, and sure, it annoyed Lucas when the girls Eliott went to highschool with literally fell over themselves to try to talk and flirt with him, but that was normal. Lucas just didn’t want someone to steal away his best friend, especially when none of those girls seemed right for him anyway. 

Lucas wondered if in another universe Eliott was thinking of him as beautiful, and Lucas was there skating alongside him, clueless as ever. 

Eliott started talking to him then, bursting his bubble of thoughts and bringing him back to the roller rink. He was talking about some new art style he was trying, where he would draw people as animals instead of humans, try to match each person to the animal he thought suited them best. 

“What animal are you?” Lucas asked, and Eliott thought about it for a moment, even though Lucas knew he’d just been waiting for Lucas to ask. 

“A raccoon,” he said definitively, and Lucas giggled.

“A raccoon?”

“A raccoon.”

Lucas didn’t really understand. Eliott didn’t scream raccoon to him, though admittedly he wasn’t the artist here. “Why a raccoon?”

“Because they’re awesome,” Eliott scoffed, “Plus, they wear a mask.”

Lucas cast his gaze downward. “Do you wear a mask?”

“Sometimes,” Eliott admitted, “But never with you.”

Lucas felt his heart warm and flutter in a way that was uncalled for with such a simple statement. They said things like that all the time, this wasn’t special, so why was his heart racing like it was? “What animal am I?” he asked to take his mind off it.

Eliott lifted a hand and ran it through Lucas’ unruly and somewhat spiky hair. “A hedgehog.”

“Hey!” Lucas protested, but Eliott interjected immediately.

“Don’t ‘hey!’ me, hedgehogs are amazing. Tiny, adorable, sweet to those they love but a little prickly when they feel uncomfortable.” 

Lucas considered it. It was pretty spot on, if he was being honest. His heart took another leap at the thought that Eliott had taken so much time picking an animal to match who Lucas was, inside and out, and that he knew Lucas better than anyone in the entire world. Sometimes better than Lucas himself. 

He had a sudden sensation in the pit of his stomach, like the drop on a rollercoaster, a feeling of falling. It hit him all at once, and it was so glaringly obvious that he ran through his earlier thoughts of denial with a shake of his head. 

He was falling, most definitely, falling in love with Eliott. 

Well, fuck, what was he supposed to do with that? He certainly couldn’t tell Eliott that he was gay now, not when he now knew what he felt and why he felt it. Maybe it was a harmless, crush, and it would go away, but Lucas suspected the crush stage may have started even before he knew it was a crush. 

Never have a crush on Eliott his ass. 

He was only thirteen. No one ended up with the person they had a crush on when they were thirteen, that kind of thing only happens in movies. All he had to do was pretend, as long as he had to, until he found someone else that made him feel like Eliott did, like a whole, undamaged human being. He could do that, it wasn’t like he’d still be pining four years later or anything. 

+1. 

A Troye Sivan song was playing, which brought a small smile to Lucas’ lips. After he’d chickened out in telling Eliott he was gay that one fateful day at the roller rink, he’d been determined to keep both his secrets until the day he died. But then Troye Sivan had released Blue Neighborhood. And Lucas had listened to every song more times than he could count. And he’d blurted out he was gay to Eliott out of nowhere the very next day after the album came out. 

For some reason, they were back at the roller rink, and Lucas grinned with satisfaction as he finally got a pair of skates with blue wheels. Eliott’s were that beautiful golden yellow, just like when they were younger.

It had actually been quite a while since their last visit, both claiming they were too busy to make time. Lucas wasn’t sure if that was true for either of them, but it had felt like something had changed that day. They’d both blamed it on being high but Lucas knew that wasn’t the case. Maybe he’d been too forward and Eliott had gotten scared. 

They stepped onto the rink like usual, Lucas’ hand in Eliott’s, steady and warm, and they let their other senses overtake them, leaving their thoughts to be lost to time and forget that anything existed outside that beautiful and unforgettable roller rink. 

It was unusually crowded, which Lucas hoped meant business was back and booming again. He didn’t know what he would do if the rink closed, where he would go to feel alive. Then again, looking at Eliott, he realized he felt most alive wherever Eliott was. They could be at the bottom of the ocean, but if they were together Lucas would cherish every moment. 

“Why do you always take me here?” Lucas asked, because he genuinely wanted to know. Sure, it was _ their _ place, but they could have found a new place at any time. Lucas loved the roller rink, he was just sure Eliott must be sick of it by now.

Eliott spun around, skating backwards to face Lucas while they spoke. “What do you mean?”

“I don’t know, we could go anywhere! I don’t want you to feel like you have to come here for me,” Lucas said, always terrible at articulating what he was feeling. 

“I’d do anything for you Lulu,” Eliott said simply, “And besides, I love it here.”

Lucas smiled, and Eliott returned it, the softness emanating out of them so intimate and beautiful. “I can switch it up for the next date though, if you want,” Eliott continued, and Lucas tripped over his skates.

“Woah, you ok?” Eliott extended a hand to help him up and Lucas blinked a few times, trying to process what Eliott had said. _ For the next date _. Maybe it was just a turn of phrase? 

“The next date?” Lucas asked without meaning to, still sitting on the ground. 

Eliott’s eyes went wide and they flicked away from Lucas’ face as his cheeks turned a bright red only emphasized by the neon lights overhead. “Yes?” 

When Lucas didn’t say anything more, a look of comprehension dawned on Eliott’s face. “Wait a second. You know that this is a date, right?”

Lucas did not know that. 

His silence must have spoken volumes, because Eliott retracted his hand, putting his face into both of his hands. “They’ve all been dates, Lucas.”

“How was I supposed to know that?” Lucas said indignantly. He wasn’t _ that _ dumb.

“I thought I made it fairly obvious! After last time, though, I thought for sure I went too far, scared you off,” Eliott lamented in a strained sort of voice. 

Lucas made his way to standing finally, head a bit clearer, but still confused. “You went too far? You kissed my forehead because we were high.”

“I kissed your forehead because I wanted to kiss your lips but I was too scared to.”

“Well I hugged you because I was too scared to kiss you,” Lucas argued.

Eliott’s smile returned in the form of a small smirk. “So it’s a competition now to which one of us was more of a dumbass?” 

“It’s not a competition, I didn’t even realize we’d been on multiple dates,” Lucas pointed out.

“You’re right. Why did I fall in love with such an idiot?” Eliott said with a laugh, before his face blanched. 

Lucas took another moment to right his equilibrium. “Fall in love?”

Eliott could have backtracked, denied it, but instead he set his jaw and nodded. “Completely.”

“Well maybe you _are_ the biggest dumbass then, if you didn’t realize I’ve been in love with you since I was thirteen,” Lucas said softly, breathlessly.

There was barely a moment for Lucas to pause and regret his words before Eliott was right in front of him, pulling him close as possible and capturing his lips. In Lucas’ mind fireworks exploded.

Lucas kissed Eliott back the way he’d always dreamed of doing and when they parted he took in everything, from the way Eliott’s eyes crinkled at the sides, to the swollen appearance of Eliott’s lips, to the way the lights bounced off his hair and cast that same serene glow they always did. Lucas laughed to himself, pulling Eliott back into another kiss.

The lights were yellow.

**Author's Note:**

> i've always had a hc that troye sivan was essential in lucas' sexual awakening, so...
> 
> find me on tumblr: @livvyblxckthxrn


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